Monthly Archives: January 2012

This Is Just Too Funny, I Have To Re-Post It Here

Credit to the original author, a spin of the thought-provoking dialog between Jack Nicholson’s and Tom Cruise’s character in A Few Good Men movie.

Yeah, IANAL, but a warrant means police have the authority to go look for something in a specific location, not the authority to command a suspect divulge information. You have to trick them into revealing the secret by leveraging their own ego:

Col. Jessep: You want answers?

Kaffee: I think I'm entitled.

Col. Jessep: You want answers?

Kaffee: I want the truth!

Col. Jessep: You can't handle the truth!
[pause]

Col. Jessep: Son, we live in a world that has tubes,
and those tubes have to be guarded by encryption
algorithms. Who's gonna do it? You? You, 
Lt. Weinburg? I have more numerous salt bits than 
you could possibly fathom. You weep for digital 
forensics, and you curse the cipher.

You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not 
knowing what I know. That cryptography's invention, 
while inconvenient, probably keeps secrets. And my 
use of it, while absurd and incomprehensible to you, 
keeps secrets. You don't want the truth because 
deep down in places you don't talk about at 
parties, you want secrets to be kept, you need 
secrets to be kept.

We use words like key, code, hash. We use these 
words as the backbone of a science dedicated to 
securing communication. You use them as a specter. 

I have neither the time nor the inclination to 
explain cryptography to a man who rises and sleeps 
under the blanket of the very security that it 
provides, and then questions the security it 
provides for others. I would rather you just said 
thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I 
suggest you pick up a decrypter, and start brute 
forcing. Either way, I don't give a damn what you 
think you are entitled to.

Kaffee: Do you know the private key?

Col. Jessep: I know the premise of encry...

Kaffee: Do you know the private key?

Col. Jessep: 4b752O7o3dgJ#?;6q7IxLBr7:#gUL^!

Boom! Techno-lawyered.

I just put some line breaks for easier reading.

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Fluxbox Screenshot

No I’m not dead, yet.

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